We live in a day-and-age where everything gets documented online. From our Sunday waffle breakfast (because everyone cares, right!) to our trip to town, the hairdresser’s, the gym, you name it. It’s all there. Online. For the world to see. Thanks to Snapchat, Instagram and, the absolute hottest of all – TikTok – there are so many outlets in which we can share our lives on. And let’s not forget that rush of dopamine (a.k.a all those snaps, likes and whatnot) that we know and love.
We’re almost encouraged to flaunt our every move. And c’mon, who doesn’t love all that attention when others get to see all those $$$ we’ve been able to spend on fancy stuff from high-life holidays to dazzling dinners.
Who’s It For?
A friend once said something to me a while back that stuck in my mind ever since. She said (ever so seriously): “What’s the use in going to a fancy hotel if no one can see it?”. I suppose that’s the problem. We need to get back into the groove of doing things for ourselves. Without falling into the trap of spending money simply for flaunting’s sake. In the end, we’re just making others jealous, causing them to feel bad about themselves. And that’s just not a nice thought at all. The last we want is to make others feel bad.
Take that holiday. Book that spa date. Indulge in that delicious meal. Take a break from life. Spend time with your loved ones. For yourself. And yourself only. Be present and soak up the moment. The world (and your online friends), can definitely wait.
Live By Your Rules
People think that wearing a Canada Goose paired with the latest Balenciaga sock boots or whatever, is a sign of wealth. But it’s not. All it shows is that you’ve chosen to spend (probably a bit too much) money on a coat and socks shoes. But that’s it. Nothing more, nothing less. Let me ask you this: if brands were invisible would you still spend £575 on those Gucci sneaks (minus those glitzy letters), or would a pair of ordinary ones do the job? (Psst: read here why 64% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck!)
The thing is, we’ve become so used to impressing others, trying so hard to make some sort of impression that we lose sight of who we are and what we really want. I beg you, please don’t waste your money trying to impress others. Because the others don’t really care! Not nearly as much as you think. Everyone’s too busy thinking about themselves.
Trust me, if I had asked whether you’d rather stash £500 in an investment account that (hopefully) grows each year and after 10 years it could’ve doubled or tripled or to splash out that same £500 on ONE pair of shoes. I guarantee (and pray!) you’d choose the investment route. But we don’t always think like that before we make big purchases. And maybe we should.
Sure, I love good clothing. I really do. It makes me feel good as much as the next person. But designer swag for designer’s sake ain’t a priority for me and if lockdown has taught me anything it’s that nothing beats a pair of humble sweats. We went basic for more than an entire year, and to be honest, it’s kinda stuck. Well, for my at least! Getting all dressed up is a bother and frankly not all that worth it anymore. Comfort is the ultimate flex.
For Us!
Big purchases should be for ourselves. And ourselves only. For our enjoyment and pleasure. But most of all to make us feel good; not to feed our inner insecurities. Because if you’re doing this only to look good for others, you’ll regret it one day down the line and hey, that insecurity will still be there. I promise you that no one cares what you wear, where you (do or don’t) travel to or what you eat for brunch on Sundays.
Everyone’s too busy with their own stuff to care. And trust me, that’s a good thing! Imagine if we wasted precious time and mental energy thinking about what others did/wore/ate! We’d have zero time for anything that actually matters!
We live in a society where people make instant assumptions about you based on how you dress. But here’s the thing, the top 1% don’t need to flaunt nothing. Sure, they’ll happily spend a few hundred dollars on a scarf/dress/handbag but (for the most part anyway), they’ve worked so damn hard to get where they are that that in itself enough.
And to be honest, they’re way too busy tending to their growing portfolios to worry about what others think of them, in the slightest bit! The richer people get, the less they care what others think. (Psst: read here why the top 0.001% would gladly switch lives with you.)
We care way too much what other people think of us but here’s the thing: we all lead busy lives and we all care about ourselves. We don’t spend hours thinking about others and what they are/aren’t up to, so why would anyone else spend so much of their precious time and mental energy thinking about you?
So, next time you order yourself a designer hoodie (and a grossly overpriced one at that but I guess that’s kinda the point, right?!), ask yourself if you’re buying it to enjoy, and to make you feel good or if you’re splashing out simply to give off a certain impression. If it’s the latter, maybe you don’t need the hoodie after all. (Read here what my worst, most expensive purchase taught me!)
Privacy Perks
The top 1% are used to being incognito. They want their privacy. And they’ll do anything to get it. They do not need, nor want, their entire neighbourhood to know their net wealth nor how much they spend on their trips to Barbados or on their michelin-star dinner. Money isn’t something you should be flaunting. If you have it; enjoy it. If you don’t, start making it. Don’t waste your time on fancy things all to give off a certain impression to others. It ain’t worth it.
When people know that you have money, they’ll treat you slightly differently. They might expect you (or even ask you) to foot the restaurant bills and you could get charged more on insurance. Some things are best kept private. And money is one of those things.
This is totally contradictory to the world we live in. Since many people value money, they’ll want to show off what they have. So that others respect/like/admire them. Because that’ll feel good. But you want someone to like you for You. To be with you for your splendid and umatched company. Not for your pots of money.
You don’t really wanna be second-guessing your friends, wondering whether they’re with you for you or for that dosh of yours. Oh, and I dunno who needs to hear this but there’s only so much you should reveal on dates! You don’t need to tell every potential how much you’re earning and what investment you do or don’t have. Nothing wrong with a little bit of privacy.
So next time you spot a passer-by in some non-designer swag, don’t judge them. They’re not spending for others, and we could all take a leaf outa their books. It’s high-time that you start to enjoying your seemingly ordinary clothing and embrace being You. No amount of designer wear can – or should – change that.
Learn to feel empowered in your own skin and you’ll be 10x happier – and richer – for it.
Go on, try it.
Disclaimer: This blog is not investment or financial advice. It is my opinion only. This blog is not a personal recommendation to buy/sell any security, or to adopt any such investment strategy. Always do your own research before you commit to any investment.
Knead Your Dough 